Just last night, when I finally acknowledged the bite in the nighttime breeze did I realize that Christmas is fast approaching. Appropriately in a festive mood, I opened my notebook and searched for that folder of Christmas songs. Halfway into listening to it, it began to sink in to me that those were songs you have stored in my notebook in anticipation of Christmas – a Christmas we thought we would still celebrate together.

Song after song played, sometimes festive, sometimes lonely. And then there I was, thinking back to that night when you gave me that notebook looking more excited than I was. Has it been really 10 months now?

I can’t help but think of the sadness I try to avoid. I try to escape from the thought that there is a permanent void where you once have been. I try hard to steer away from the thought that I have lost you when I wasn’t ready to. But then again, who is ever ready to lose somebody? I guess, having been there, I’d say pretty much nobody.

You… you still make me feel so much despite our distance. Who would’ve thought I’d be listening to those Christmas songs longing for what once had been “us”. I miss what you were once to me, Christmas or no Christmas.

Today I feel that I’ve been making mistake after mistake. I don’t like it. But I am learning and I think that I should keep in mind to never lose the lessons. Just today I’m going to forgive myself and accept that it’s alright to make mistakes. It’s alright. It’s alright.

But then again, people will know what I am like as I write in this blog. Who am I? I ask myself that too. Too many times in fact, that I’ve long lost count on how many.

But for the sake of proper introductions, I suppose this will do. I am a girl from the islands. There are many girls in the islands but I am like no other. What sets me apart is the same thing that sets apart each and every human being in this planet. Let’s skip the explanation.

What started this is a spur of the moment thought. What if I start something without having to disclose who I am? What if I share myself without having to restrict myself as I normally would for fear of worrying my family and friends. So here I am writing now, making my own little mark in this complex web of cyberspace jungle. I am still delighted to have an electronic voice in our world of endless possibilities.